Worthy of reposting - I am Your Disease

I posted this originally on this blog: http://repairmanual4selfdestructivebehavior.blogspot.com/2006/08/i-am-your-disease.html and it's worthy of reposting here!

While you're at it see this post:
Why so many can't deal with the 12 steps

I am your disease
Hello...

Just in case you forgot me...I am your disease.
I hate meetings, I hate higher powers. I hate anyone
who has and works a program. To all who come in
contact with me:

I wish you suffering and I wish you death.

Allow me to tell you about myself.

I am the disease of addiction.
I am cunning, baffling, and powerful...
I have killed millions; I have ruined the lives of
millions more...and I am pleased.

I love to catch you by surprise. I love pretending
that I am your friend and lover. I have given you
comfort, haven't I? Wasn't I there when you were lonely?
When you wanted to die, didn't you call on me, and
didn't I answer?

I was there. I love to make you hurt; I love to make
you cry. Better yet, I love to make you so numb that
you can neither hurt nor cry. I love to help you give
up and feel hopeless. When you can't feel anything at all,
that is my true gratification.

And all that I ask from you is long term suffering and
lonely despair.

I've been there for you always. When things were going
right in your life, you invited me in. You said you didn't
deserve these good things, and I was the only one who agreed
with you. Together, we were able to destroy everything
good in your life.

When things went wrong, I was there to agree with you
about how unfair life is and how blameless you are for
anything that happens to you.

I was the only one who would crawl down into the slimy
paralysis of self-pity and wallow around with you there.

People don't take me seriously, and while this wounds
my pride, I don't really mind because it so strongly
serves my purpose.

People take strokes serously;heart attacks...diabetes
...AIDS, these they take serously. Fools. Without my help,
those illnesses would not even be possible, for many
people.

I am such a hated disease, and yet I do not come uninvited.

You choose whether or not to have me active in
your life. Doesn't that prove how powerful and
cunning I am? So many choose me, over reality and
hope--even while they say they hate me.

But more than
you hate me, I hate all of you who have embraced
recovery. Your refusal to invite me in...your
program...your meetings...your higher power. All of these things
weaken and disgust me, and I can't function in the
manner I am accustomed to. Now, I must lie here quietly,
waiting.

Oh, you don't see me much anymore, but I am
here...and I have all the time in the world to wait for you.
When you only exist, I may live. When you live, I may
only exist. But I am here... And until we meet again
-if we meet again- I wish you misery and death, just
as I always have done and always will
do...

Most Sincerely,
Your disease

http://victimbehavior.blogspot.com/2007/11/mind-over-matter-religion-vs.html
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These articles are for informational purposes only. Contact a licenced counselor if you're in crisis.